Anniversary

Written on the Judah trolley, San Francisco, 1965 after reading that Emily Bronte polished the bannister on the day she died as if still waiting, expecting a special guest.

~~~~~~~~~

I have been polishing, arranging, readying.
And I am tired, grateful to go on
but tired.
Today is the day, approximately
(I didn't think to mark it)
that I decided it would happen.
Ten years, and through all the changes,
chaos and disappointments
sifting around me,
I have kept polishing, arranging,
practising, my daily turns
heartily met,
never letting down,
for who can guess the moment?
Today, I am sad that you are late.
But recognizing that
at this very minute
I may hear you on the steps,
I run to cut fresh flowers.